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Good Grief is always here to help. Whether you are grieving or wishing to support someone in grief, we have compiled resources, tips and recommended reading that we think you will find useful.
Other Services
Warning Signs
Advice for Adults (.pdf)
What to say/What Not to Say (.pdf)
Recommended Reading Lists (.pdf)
Other Services for Children and Adults in Grief Direct Services
Center for Life Transition - www.centerforlifetransition.com - consultation, assessment, referrals, and individual/group counseling are available.
Compassionate Friends - www.compassionatefriends.org
The Alcove - www.thealcove.org
Creative Heartwork - www.creativeheartwork.org
Camp Comfort Zone - www.comfortzonecamp.org
Children of September 11th - www.childrenofseptember11.org
GOALs Center for Families - www.goalscenter.org
Rainbows NJ State Chapter - www.rainbowsnj.org
Camp Haze - www.camphaze.org
National Organizations
The Dougy Center for Grieving Children - www.dougy.org
Center for Loss and Transition - www.centerforloss.com
Families of September 11th - www.familiesofseptember11.org
National Alliance for Grieving Children - www.nationalallianceforgrievingchildren.org
RAINBOWS, Inc. International - www.rainbows.org Grief Support Website Resources
www.griefnet.org
www.griefrecovery.com
www.centerforloss.com
www.comfortzonecamp.org
Warning Signs That a Referral Might Be Warranted
Grief is natural. Everyone grieves as a result of loss. You may be in a position to observe a child suffering from grief who may need some help. Contact Good Grief or seek another resource if you notice any of the following persisting for several months:
- Inability to speak about the deceased person
- Aggressive behavior
- Anxiety
- Somatic complaints
- Sleeping difficulties
- Eating disturbance
- Marked social withdrawal
- Persistent blame or guilt
- Self-destructive behavior
Good Grief works cooperatively with many grief resources throughout the state and nationally. These are some we are aware of and, in many cases, have first hand knowledge of. If you would like a personal referral please call 908.522.1999 or email.
Recommended Reading
These are books we've read and endorse and books that others have found helpful and shared with us. Books are arranged by age and type of loss. Loss due to divorce is currently mixed in with loss due to death. We hope you find this list helpful.
If you are a concerned adult wanting to help a child in your life cope with loss, you can't go wrong reading any book by Alan Wolfet or Earl Grollman. Maria Trozzi's book "Talking with Children About Loss" is also excellent.
Any book or resource written by the Dougy Center (www.dougy.org) is endorsed by Good Grief.
If you know of a book you feel should be on our list, please contact us at info@good-grief.org.
Preschool to Early School Age
Where's Jess?, by J. Johnson
In this picture book, a mother and father answer in simple and comforting ways a young child's questions about death and the death of their new baby.
About Dying: An Open Book for Parents and Children Together, by Sara Stein
This book teaches about death, funerals, burial, and remembering by telling the story of two siblings who experience the death of a pet bird, and who later experience the death of their grandfather. It also features text for parents to help them deal with questions and issues children may have.
The Empty Place: A Child's Guide through Grief, by Roberta Temes
In this book, a young boy talks about how empty he feels since his sister died and talks with a baby sitter who had a similar experience. It touches on guilt, lack of interest in old activities, and changes in parental behavior.
I Had a Friend Named Peter - Talking to Children about the Death of a friend, by Janice Cohn
The Dead Bird, by Margaret Brown
When Dinosaurs Die: A Guide to Understanding Death, by Laurie Brown Preschool to School Age
Sad Isn't Bad - A Good-Grief Guidebook for Kids Dealing With Loss, by Michaelene Mundy
About the death of a grandparent.
It's Not Your Fault KoKo Bear: A Read Together Book for Parents and Young Children During Divorce, by Vicki Lansky
Great for children ages 3-7 who are experiencing a divorce in their family
The Fall of Freddie the Leaf, by Leo Buscaglia
This book shows the seasons of life using the story of Freddie the Leaf, who falls from the tree in autumn. It explains that leaves do not come back to life and that death is not the same as sleep.
Thumpy's Story: A Story of Love and Grief Shared by Thumpy, the Bunny, by N. Dodge
This book tells a simple story with soft, expressive illustrations of two rabbit parents who help their surviving child by dealing sensitively with fears and questions. It is designed to help children and parents express their own grief, and is available as a coloring book and a workbook in which the child can write and draw.
Lifetimes: A Beautiful Way to Explain Death to Children, by Bryan Mellonie and Robert Ingpen
This book talks about the various lengths of life spans for plants, animals, and people and says that dying is very much a part of living. It explains that there is a beginning and an end with living in between, and that sometimes things are too hurt or ill to continue living, so they die.
The Tenth Good Thing about Barney, by Judith Viorst
This book tells the story of a cat who dies and is buried. The child and father discuss heaven, and later they plant seeds in the garden. The father explains that Barney will become part of the ground and help plants grow, which they decide is a pretty good job for a cat.
I Don't Want To Talk About It, by Jeanie Franz
A story about divorce for young children
Dinosaurs Divorce: A Guide for Changing Families, by Laurene Krasny Brown and Marc Brown
Help children to understand divorce and all the other changes that go along with it. School Age
Today My Sister Died, by Ronee Domske
This is a story narrated by an older sister who lost a 3 and 1/2-year-old sister in an accident. She shows how to deal with things by discussing her relationships with her brother and parents, and by exploring the feelings that come about during funeral planning, holidays, doing things with friends, getting a family picture taken, and remembering.
The Magic Moth, by V. Lee
This book tells the story of a 10-year-old girl with a heart defect and the impact her death has on her family. It is told from the perspective of her six-year-old brother, describing with compassion and realism his thoughts, feelings, anger, questions, uncertainties, and confusion.
I Don't Want To Talk About It, by Jeanie Franz,
A story about divorce for young children
Children are Not Paper Dolls, by E. Levy
This book tells about the wide variety of reactions and feeling from children who have lost a sibling. Pictures, poems, and quotes from bereaved siblings look at funerals, families, friends, school, holidays, and feelings.
My Twin Sister Erika, by I. Voge
This story expresses the feelings of love and rivalry between twin sisters and the strong feelings of loss when one dies.
Aarvy Aardvark Finds Hope, by Donna O'Toole
In this book, Aarvy the Aardvark is befriended by Ralphy Rabbit, who helps Aarvy work through stages of grief by telling him about how he felt when his sister died.
The Old Dog, by Sara Abbott
Nanna, by Jennifer Bartoli
When People Die, by Joanne Bernstein and Stephen Gullo
About Dying, by Sara Bonnett Stein Late School Age to Adolescent
Beat the Turtle Drum, by C. Green
This book tells the story of two sisters who are great friends and the anger, guilt, and sadness one of them feels when the other is suddenly killed by an accidental fall from a tree.
Bridge to Terabithia, Katherine Paterson (also a movie)
How it Feels When a Parent Dies, by Jill Krementz
To Hell with Dying, by Alice Walker
Season of Discovery, by Gloria Gldreich
Bubba, Me and Memories, by Barbara Pomerantz
The Happy Funeral, by Eve Bunting
First Snow, by Helen Coutant
The Mountains of Tibet, by Mordicai Gerstein Adolescent
Straight Talk about Death for Teenagers: How to Cope with Losing Someone You Love, by E. Grollman
This book speaks to teens in a way that acknowledges their feelings, promotes discussion and offers hope.
When a Friend Dies- A Book for Teens about Grieving and Healing, by Marilyn Gootman
Losing Someone You Love: When a Brother or Sister Dies, by E. Richter
In this book, 15 young people who have lost a brother or sister share their grief experiences. With honesty and courage, they talk openly about how the death occurred, their feelings, and their difficulties adjusting at home and at school.
Angel Catcher: A Journal of Loss and Remembrance, by Kathy and Amy Eldon - A unique and sensitive guide designed to help teens overcome the loss of a loved one. Helps one to celebrate the life of a loved one. A place to write, draw and place photos to capture memories.
Facing Change: Falling Apart and Coming Together Again in the Teen Years, by Donna O'Toole
Say Goodnight, Gracie, By Julie Deaver
Shira: A legacy of Courage, by Earl Grollman
Tiger Eyes, by Judy Blume
How it Feels When a Parent Dies, by Jill Krementz Adults
Healing the Bereaved Child: Grief Gardening, Growth Through Grief and Other Touchstones for Caregivers, by Alan D. Wolfelt, Ph.D.
Bereaved Children and Teens: A support Guide for Parents and Professionals, edited by Earl Grollman
Talking With Children About Loss, by Maria Trozzi
Words, Strategies, and Wisdom to Help Children Cope With Death, Divorce and Other Difficult Times.
When Children Grieve - For Adults to Help Children Deal with Death, Divorce, Pet Loss, Moving and Other Losses, by John James and Russell Friedman
Parenting Through Crisis, by Barbara Coloroso
Guiding Your Child Through Grief, by Mary Ann and James Emswiler
Talking about Death - A Dialogue between Parent and Child, by Earl Grollman
The Grieving Child: A Parent's Guide, by Helen Fitzgerald
Life and Loss: A Guide to Helping Grieving Children, by Linda Goldman
Never the Same - Coming to Terms with the Death of a Parent, by Donna Schuurman
Motherless Daughters - The Legacy of Loss, by Hope Edelman
On Grieving the Death of a Father, by Harold Ivan Smith
The Loss That Is Forever: The Lifelong Impact of the Early Death of a Mother or Father, by Maxine Harris
Helping Children Cope with Separation and Loss, by Claudia Jarratt
Healing a Child's Grieving Heart - 100 Practical Ideas for Families, Friends and Caregivers, by Alan D. Wolfelt
Children and Grief: When a Parent Dies, by William Worden
On Grief and Grieving, by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross and David Kessler
The Grief Club, by Melody Beattie
Part memoir, part self help book, part journalism, Beattie shares her own experiences with the loss of a 12 year old son, divorce, and drug addiction.
When Bad Things Happen to Good People, by Rabbi Kushner
For adults who are suffering loss and grief.
Caring for Your Grieving Child: Engaging activities for Dealing with Loss and Transition, by Martha Wakenshaw
Playing with your child is the best thing you can do to help your child heal from grief. Fun exercises that will help child work through feelings of loss and sorrow. A great resource for children
Talking to Children about Separation and Divorce: A Handbook for Parents, by Risa Garon and Barbara Mandell - Useful and practical advice to survive separation and divorce with children. Gives a good roadmap through challenges of supporting children through family change.
Living in the Shadow of the Ghosts of Grief by Alan Wolfelt-Especially helpful for adults grieving childhood or long ago losses which
haven't been fully mourned. "Accumulated, unreconciled loss affects every
aspect of our lives. Living in the Shadow is a beautifully written compass
with the needle ever-pointing in the direction of hope." -- Greg Youder,
grief counselor. This compassionate guide will help you learn to identify
and mourn your carried grief so you can go on to live the joyful, whole life
you deserve.
Sibling Loss
The Empty Room by Elizabeth DeVita-Raeburn
Loss of Child
The Bereaved Parent, by Harriet Sarnoff Schiff
Very reassuring and helpful and tells the truth about living through the loss of a child.
Beyond Tears: Living After Losing a Child, by Ellen Mitchell, Carol Barkin, Audrey Cohen, and Lorenza Colletti
Love Never Dies: A Mother's Journey from Loss to Love, by Sandy Goodman
A Broken Heart Still Beats: After Your Child Dies, by Anne McCracken and Mary Semel
Stars In The Deepest Night: After the Death of a Child, by Genesse Bourdeau Gentry
Saving Graces - Finding Solace and Strength from Friends and Strangers, by Elizabeth Edwards
How To Survive the Loss of A Child, by Catherine Snaders
The Worst Loss, by Barbara Rosof
Loss of Spouse
Mourning and Dancing, by Sally Miller
Widow to Widow, by Genevieve Davis Ginsburg
Thoughtful, Practical Ideas for Rebuilding Your Life
Loss Due to Suicide
No Time to Say Goodbye, by Carla Fine
Touched by Suicide, by Carla Fine
After A Parent's Suicide: Helping Children Heal by Margo Requarth
How to explain suicide to children and how children grieve, how grief impacts
adolescents and more.
But I Didn't Say Goodbye: For parents and professionals helping child suicide survivors by Barbara Rubel
A great resource to help children deal with the difficult and often hidden and stigmatizing after effects of suicide.
After A Suicide: A Workbook for Grieving Kids, by The Dougy Center
A great workbook for children.
Sudden Death
I Wasn't Ready to Say Goodbye: Surviving, Coping and Healing after the Sudden Death of a Loved One by Brook Noel and Pamela Blair
Shows grieving readers how to endure, survive and grow from the pain and turmoil surrounding human loss.
Violent Death
A Grief Like No Other. Surviving the Violent Death of Someone You Love, by Kathleen O'Hara
Violent death includes: suicide, drug overdose, death by vehicular homicide and drunk drivers brings to survivors a different kind of grief. A valuable and important resource for victims and survivors.
Living With Grief After Sudden Loss: Suicide, Homicide, Accident, Heart Attack, Hospice Foundation of America, edited by Kenneth Doka
Men and Grief
Grief Quest: Men Coping With Loss, by Robert Miller
A map for men seeking to heal their grief.
Childhood Sexual Abuse
The Me Nobody Knows A Guide for Teen Survivors, by Barbara Bean and Shari Bennett
For teens who have been abused and don't know where to turn. Shows survivors how to cope.
Pet Loss
Finding Peace after the Loss of a Loved Animal Companion by Diane Pomerance
This book is written with care and compassionate wisdom that helps children and adults alike find an awareness of eternal life and peace. A must read for anyone grieving the loss of a pet.
When a Pet Dies, by Fred Rogers
A way to help children deal with loss of a loved pet
Inspiration
Gifts From the Broken Jar: Rediscovering Hope, Beauty and Joy, by PJ Long
A book that will help or inspire those who are navigating through their own darkness.
Tuesdays with Morrie, by Mitch Albom
A story of a writer getting a second chance to discover life through the death of a friend.
Letters to Sam - A Grandfather's Lessons on Love, Loss and the Gifts of Life, by Daniel Gottlieb
Dr Gottlieb shares the wisdom he has derived from living in a wheelchair, battling his own inner demons and practicing psychology for the past 35 years. A gift to all families.
A Grace Disguised: How the Soul Grows through Loss, by Jerry Sittser
A tragic accident introduced the author to loss of a magnitude few of us encounter. This book is about the grace that can transform us in the midst of sorrow. For those experiencing loss, A Grace Disguised offers a compassionate, deeply affirming message of hope, richness in living, and joy not after the darkness, but even in the midst of it. |
